What a difference a 2nd baby makes – why #dadtime hasn’t been blogged as much on 2nd #sharedparentalleave

I’ve become conscious that this blog is starting to read like a bit of a good-pub-guide to East Surrey, with a couple of posts pending that feature a walk/cycle and a pub (though one of them was excellent). And I think there is a reason for that. Somehow, despite No.2 sleeping “better” (at least more predictably and with less walking) than Junior, I actually have less time to blog!

Part of this is obvious – it simply isn’t possible to do it when Junior is at home as well, especially as he no longer naps in daytime at all, except the odd catnap in the car on the way places. In addition, No.2’s consistency with me of only sleeping for 30 minutes simply isn’t long enough to really get into the swing of things – by the time I’ve decompressed slightly, if I start writing I have to stop long before I’ve finished. Which may indicate I’m writing too long posts, but it is catch-22 – the less I get to write the more I have to say!

The other impact, and why it’s become a pub guide, is that this means I don’t have the reflective time to write some of the more introspective posts as last time. And I think that is my main reflection on having a second child. You simply don’t have the time (at this stage) to be truly reflective, you have to be much more reactive and immediate. Which neither Mummy nor I find easy to sustain for long periods of time. It is also having an impact on Junior, and I think to some extent leading to his behaviour issues, although that is also the direct constraints on the time and quality of time we get to spend with him.

Needless to say this hasn’t been the only difference – one of the posts I WILL get round to writing is about how different the characters and interactions with the two are – every multiple parent warns you about how different they will be, but you don’t really believe them until you’ve got two and you see just how different two superficially similar crying-eating-pooing machines can be.

I just heard a rustle…break over!


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